Solace in my Dan Quayle press pass

The other day I cleaned my desk.

It’s one of the things I do when I start feeling a little squirrely, or, as my friend Josh Wooten calls me, “paranoid.”

The other is to go hide for a few days but that option doesn’t really exist with Just Wright Citrus, whose no-vacation policy was somehow overlooked while reviewing the company personnel handbook.

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Cleaning the desk is therapeutic and necessary. I can’t stand clutter and that’s exactly what my desk turns into when my mind is in a million places. I don’t put anything away and it just piles up. This is how mistakes are made.

When the junk is gone I can enjoy my stuff. All desk people have stuff, right? Little of this or that, instant smiles. 

For reasons none other than it’s Friday and what the heck, here’s a rundown of my desk stuff:

• My first Just Wright Citrus reporter notebook. I usually toss these things when they fill up but this one I kept. The sentiment is similar to a business that frames its first dollar.

 

• I have an inbox. I never know what to put there. Right now it’s Citrus County's “strategic planning policy agenda and targets for action.” Coming to a blog near you.

 

• A Brannen Bank wall calendar, the sole purpose of which is to keep track of county commissioner email requests. I kid you not.

• A stack of business cards from other people. Business cards have lost their luster in this smartphone world, but I keep them and I always have Just Wright Citrus cards with me. (My Rolodex at the Chronicle that was older than dirt. I think it included the names of Inverness officials who stole the courthouse from Mannfield.)
  

• A framed photo of my old boss, Gerry Mulligan, that I took in his Chronicle office while interviewing him two days before his retirement. It would be the last story I'd write for the Chronicle. The lessons he taught me about community journalism have become much more valuable the last two years. I don’t want to forget my roots.
  

• A framed photo of Deb and me moments after our engagement. I’ll tell you about that someday.

 

• A stuffed toy llama. These little llamas are the focal point of a NAMI-Citrus “Lighten the Load” campaign, which you can read all about here. Some days I’m not firing on all cylinders and the llama makes me smile.

 

• A bag of Doritos from a friend in response to my Dorito-fried snake blog. It’s nice that people care.

 

• An LCNI paperweight. LCNI — Landmark Community Newspapers — owned the Chronicle for much of my tenure. We were quite fortunate to have corporate ownership that truly cared about community newspapers. The Chronicle thrived under LCNI.

 

• A press pass from the Office of the Vice President in 1990 when Dan Quayle visited Ocala and I snuck onto the Secret Service press van. It remains my coolest Chronicle souvenir.

 

• A Jesus greeting card. This one has a little story.

I enjoy fun, imaginative non-offensive Jesus jokes. Well, the newsroom is constantly getting junk sent to it in hopes of a story, and someone sent us funny Christian greeting cards.

I kept one on my desk. It depicted Jesus wearing a wristband that read, “What would I do?” The caption: “Jesus in a dilemma.”

Well, I was looking one day for an, “I’m here if you need me” greeting card and came across one I liked.  With Jesus.

It reads, “You know who you can turn to when things are rough and everything just sucks? Jesus. That’s pretty much his whole thing.”

It has a cute drawing of Jesus holding a steaming mug that says “#1 Son.” Inside: “I’m available too. I’m not as good as Jesus, though.”

Until I know who to send that to, I’ll just keep it with me.

• A box of “Keep calm and trust God” cards with Scripture verses and pick-me-up notes. Here’s one: “God never gives us anything to do that He does not give us the strength to do.”

 

• Light bulb-shaped plastic candy container filled daily with Skittles. A swag gift from Deb that I cherish.

 

• Finally, on the wall, a cardboard Citrus County seal with what looks like a corner bitten off. “Established 1887.” I honestly have no idea how I ended up with it. But how many people can say they have the county seal on their wall at home?

That’s it for my desk at Just Wright Citrus World Headquarters on the shores of Big Lake Henderson. Next week we’ll tackle the company car.

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